Carly Catastrophe

In the recent years, birth control has become a very public matter. You simply can’t turn on your tv anymore without seeing ads for mirena, nuvo ring, that pill yas that gives you 4 periods a year, and countless others. And they’re all marketed as something that liberates us women.

I for one, do not feel liberated. I have taken hormonal birth control before and I hated it. It made me sick and moody and it’s a pain to remember to take your pill at exactly this time every day. But the lack of liberation goes deeper. The pill puts all of the responsibility for pregnancy prevention on women. Men no longer need to put any forethought at all into having sex. And many act as though women who don’t take the pill are  inconveniencing them by making them wear condoms. I’d rather have slightly less pleasure than risk screwing up my reproductive system.

{September 30, 2008}   Update

So, after learning that at least one person I know was googling me, I made my blog private. I’ve since changed my mind. What? I’m a woman, I can change it whenever I want dammit. I thought about deleting a few posts too but I have decided against it. This is my creative outlet and I would like to keep it as such. Although I do wish that some people would leave it alone and not google me. If you really want to know what’s going on in my life, you know how to get in contact with me and I would be more than willing to talk with you about it. I know I can’t stop you from googling me and I wouldn’t try to but, I am going to ask.

Regina, please do not google me. You know my home number, my mother can give you my cell number from there, and if you send me a myspace message I’ll give you the screen name I use now. But please, don’t google me. It kinda creeps me out.


Ps, why is it that when you google me, you get my blog and when I google me, I get info about an old actress who did B Horror movies?

{August 11, 2008}   Shop Vac part two

So I’ve just gotten back from vacation and the first thing I have to do is vacuum up the mess our electrician has left. This time however, it’s plaster or sheet rock or something. And as I’m shop vac-ing and swearing at the shop vac, I notice that it struggles to pick up the pieces and actually can’t pick up quite a few of them. And it is at this time that I realize that the shop vac and I are a lot alike. Neither one of us wants to clean up plaster, neither of is made to, and it’s not my job or the shop vac’s. While I doubt the shop vac and I will ever be friends, I do have a new found sense of respect and compassion for it.

So, it’s the begining of the 3rd week in the new office, and I don’t see it lasting much longer. Working with my mom just isn’t working. Before we even opened she could not stress enough the importance of me being her employee and not her daughter at work. However, she is the one who is in constant breach of this aggreement. Besides calling me things like “love” and “Care” (my family’s nickname for Caroline) all the time, when she’s in a bad mood, I’m the one who catches the brunt of it. And when she gets upset with me, it is in the manor of a mother to a child and not an employer to an employee. I think when I get back from vacation I’m going to look for a new job because I can’t deal with my mother causing me to break into tears at work every week.

{July 21, 2008}   Legalize it?

An almost constant topic within my group of friends is the legalization of marijuana. For a long time, I’ve been pro legalization but the more I think about it, the more I’m against it. Personally, I don’t really want the government regulating and taxing my fun. And honestly, does anyone realize how fucked the ecomony would be? If all I have is $10 and a full pack of cigarettes(because cigarettes ALWAYS come first) I’m going to buy weed with that $10 before I even think of anything else. Most of the potheads I know are like this. I give my $10 to Mary Jane Dealer who then circulates that money back into the economy by buying those obnoxious spinning rims or something. Good drug dealers ALWAYS have money, and they can spend it because their cover job flipping burgers pays most of the bills. If marijuana were to be legalized, so many people would be out of jobs and our already falling economy would fall even harder. Yeah, I would love to be able to walk into a Wawa and buy a pack of joints, but at what cost? My habit makes it possible for my dealer to take his son to Disney World and I’m not going to take Mickey Mouse away from a little boy for my own convenience.

{July 18, 2008}   Curse you shop vac

I’d like to touch briefly on a very important topic….. How much I HATE shop vacs. At my new job, my proper job title is receptionist but it’s very easily translated into office bitch. Other than normal things like answering the phone, my duties include tasks such as getting drinks for my mom and until we have a cleaning crew, doing the cleaning. And this wouldn’t be that bad if we had a real vacuum. As it stands though, we have a shop vac. One of those huge like industrial sized vacuums that requires you to be in doggy style to use and takes like an hour to do a 10 minute job. It’s the same kind of vacuum that we have at home which has caused me to not give two shits if everything in the house is covered in dog hair as long as I don’t have to vacuum with that thing.

Also, while I was bringing that damned shop vac back upstairs this morning, I hit the stair rail with my side and now I have a huge fucking bruise. Perhaps, when that damn thing least expects it, I’ll hack it to bits or push it down the stairs or something.

That’s right Shop Vac, your days are numbered. You better sleep with one eye open.

Than the sound of a good pair of heels on a good marble floor.

I’ve started a new job working as a receptionist in my mother’s law firm. I love it. And part of my job is running all of the errands. Which means, going into fancy buildings with fancy marble floors. And really, the sound of heels on marble is music to my ears. The job is awesome and I’m even doing well working with my mother which was the only worry I really had.

{April 10, 2008}  

I haven’t written in forever. I just haven’t been able to. And writing is like exercising. Don’t do it once and all of the sudden, it’s been a year since you’ve written anything. Not that you haven’t written at all but nothing that you want other people to see. Anyway, I’m back and there will be new posts soon.

{February 14, 2008}   Zombies can’t run dumbass

So I was thinking today about zombies. And how in zombie movies, the entire population except for like 5-10 people have become zombies. These 5-10 people then spend the entire movie running from these zombies. Many of them do not make it out as humans. My question is why? If you’re surrounded by zombies and you know that most likely you won’t make it, why even waste the energy fighting it? Just accept your fate as a zombie. I mean, if everyone I knew and loved had become a zombie, I wouldn’t really want to continue being a human. I couldn’t chill with my best friends or hug my family if they were zombies. Why not just become a zombie and start a new world with all your zombie buds. Better than living the rest of your life in fear of the zombies right?

et cetera